my 30-Day Blog Challenge

I just finished reading my friend's blog. She just completed her 30day blog challenge and I was inspired to do the same. Since I am at my 199th post (so fast right??), I will start on the next post. My blog entries will however not be the same as my friend's topics.

I googled around and found some interesting  topics here These are the topics you will be reading in the next (hopefully) 30 days.. Wish me luck! (Ck, teruja lps baca urblog and decided to do it straight away cause if I delay then it will probably never happen :p)

*Note : I changed Day 15 to Quran verse :) 

Here I go people!  

30-Day Blog Challenge
Day 1-Introduce, recent picture, 15 interesting facts
Day 2-Meaning behind your blog name
Day 3-Your first love
Day 4-Your parents
Day 5-Your siblings
Day 6-A picture of something that makes you happy
Day 7-Favorite movies
Day 8-A place you've traveled to
Day 9-A picture of your friends
Day 10-Something you're afraid of
Day 11-Favorite TV shows
Day 12-What you believe
Day 13-Goals
Day 14-A picture you love
Day 15- Quran verse
Day 16-Dream house
Day 17-Something you're looking forward to
Day 18-Something you regret
Day 19-Something you miss
Day 20-Nicknames
Day 21-Picture of yourself
Day 22-Favorite city
Day 23-Favorite vacation
Day 24-Something you've learned
Day 25-Put your iPod on shuffle, first 10 songs
Day 26-Picture of your family
Day 27-Pets
Day 28-Something that stresses you out
Day 29-3 Wishes
Day 30-a picture  

seek and you shall find

Have you ever walked into your kitchen only to realize that you forgot what you wanted to do/take? It just happened to me just now. Sometimes it happens to my husband too. I just watch him as he walks out of the room and came back 5 seconds later and asked me sambil garu kepala, 'I nak ambik apa dah tadi?'

Such a weird phenomenon kan? how do you explain it? I'm sure there's some medical explaination. nak google tapi taktau nak type apa kat search.

Speaking of search, I am in the midst of searching for a job or a placement in any university nearby to further my studies. motivation dah kurang compared to last time (refer previous post). I guess the 72 Hour rule is now valid. If you want something, you must take action within 72 hours or you won't feel as strong about it as you did the first time. 

In addition to this event, I decided to check  facebook less frequent. Why?

I did an observation (yes, I have that much time). I can conclude that 8 out of 10 status updates has some negative ring to it. Statistically speaking, 80% of the time, people become either demotivated, depressed or deprived. However, this is only the descriptively speaking. I need to do a Factor Analysis to conclude further. But reading all those negative status really brings me down at times. Tak pasal² kan?

Well.. wish me luck in finding my path :) I told a friend once, it ain't easy living in a foreign country that doesn't speak English. I am now in the process of finding bricks to build my own road. For me to succeed, I need to build my own road and then only I can walk through it. It's not like UK, US or other English speaking countries. But hey it's okay. At least one day I will feel satisfied walking through the roads that I have build with my own two hands. And of course with the help of Allah, support and prayers of my husband, family and true friends, InshaAllah I will get through this :)

I remember my motto when I dilanda kebuntuan during my postgraduate studies. 'Seek and you shall find'. I kept on mumbling this phrase everyday out loud for weeks while thinking and tapping my pencil on the table and I finally crack the code for my statistical program. I will never forget that moment. I literally cried. That's why I believe in how powerful believing in things can be. And right now, I really need to believe in things.

1hour

today is earth hour and tomorrow is daylight saving. that means the clock will switch when it strikes 1am, dia reverse balik to 12am. 12am, dia kedepan to 1 am. (correction, i still confuse myself with daylight saving) and then we would have 6 hours difference with KL instead of 7 hours like today. it also marks that Spring is officially officially here.

when i think of earth hour, i would remember last year, when my husband broke his leg. and now it has been a year.

I posted on my fb status that i pray for happiness for all mankind since there has been so many negative vibes around. So I decided, I am gonna be on hiatus for awhile. I need to concentrate on things that really matters. and internet or to be specific, facebook has been taking too much of my time..

I am not sure of what our plans are for tonite because germany takde earth hour. but we have been quite environmental. i think that the earth deserves more and just 1 hour per year.. we can all take part in saving the environment in so many ways :)

enjoy your earth hour!

till then!

blogger has new fonts

I am so excited when I found out this. I was experimenting with the design n suddenly I realized that I can change fonts too! What do you think of my new look ?

After choosing this font I realized that this is a typical lefthanded hand writing. Cause it's slunted to the left. But as strange as it may sound, my hand writing is slunted to the right even though I am left handed. How weird is that?

Have a great week ahead yo!

i loike

Yesterday, when I was studying my Deutsch, suddenly my husband asked me this. and it got me laughing for a solid 2 minutes..

'Kenapa dlm fb orang suka sgt cakap, I loike? Apesal? '

are you a leftie?

If you notice, I have added a few new blogs on my blog list by the left side on the panel. Also, I have changed a few things macam font, colors and added a few 3rd party HTML thingy on my blog. Demi mencantikkan ia. I suddenly realized something. Some bloggers place their tabs on the left side of the panel.. Some place it on the right. Kenapa ada different preferences? Personally for me, I like a small left panel. Simply because I am lefthanded. Kalau jalan pun, I prefer walking on the left side of a person. Because I carry my handbag on my left shoulder. So kalau nak jalan takde la terlanggar bahu with the other person. I managed to find this old blog I used to follow. Its a funny blog, in a disturbing way lah. Sometimes lawak dia mcm sesetengah orang je boleh faham. Kinda like a 30rock joke but in BM. If you wanna know which 1, you gotta check out either one of the blogs kat tepi nih (promote kawan² punya blogs :p)

Anyway, I read this blog's entry. I used to have a 'stranger' friend which I will borak borak and ceritakan masalah remaja saya padanya. Lama jugak I befriended this person virtually. From 1999 - 2003. Almost 5 years. But now, dah tak contact dah. In a way, I do agree that sometimes when you vent out things to a total stranger, it feels safer because you don't have to worry of that person menceritakan pada orang lain or judge you or apa apa lah. Because it won't effect that person pun. As long as you boleh luahkan to someone is okay. But of course now, I will tell my husband everything. Macam apehal nak citer kat orang lain kan ?

Now you have facebook asking you What's on your mind ? and you will have the urge to write every single thing. Nope. Not me anymore. I don't update personal things because it's simply too personal. Honestly, kadang - kadang tak larat tengok people who will update everything. Yes, mulalah citer pasal facebook. My husband said, I should not punish facebook (incident meng-deactivate fb account) because sikap sendiri yang tak boleh kawal. haha.. So saya dgr ckp suami and activate balik. Still haven't blogged about why I did that though. tengah mengcompose.

I guess that's the thing nowadays. Internet's function is no longer just keeping in touch, networking or online business. It's also a way of reaching out or gives us somesort of a platform to have an audience. You have that feeling of comfort knowing that there is a 'stranger' listening to you and that they might understand.

Found this

Happy Mittwoch (Wednesday) people!

slowly detaching identity

Yesterday I spent the whole day cleaning up my kitchen. It has been very 'unclean' since I came back. So kaw kaw punya kemas, although it still has an "rumah orang bujang" aura because of that Mitsubishi Lancer poster next to the almari. Tak terbuang la pulak, since I was focusing on the floor and the content of the almari, lupa pasal dinding. In the almari, I threw away botol2 lama since zaman - zaman Firdaus (if I say zaman Firdaus, it would me VERY lama because he was my husband's housemate a very long time ago and dah balik KL for more than 2 years already.. I only met him during our wedding in Gombak. So tak pernah jumpa in DE. And the bottles here, like botol kicap, sauces and every botol kaca, perlulah dibersihkan dulu before you buang. Meaning, it must be emptied and cleaned and seolah - olah nampak like brand new. AND, there is a special place to throw it. Because if you throw it dalam tong sampah biasa, nanti the tukang kutip sampah will marah.. So there is actually a place that you need to carry all the cleaned bottles and throw them.. And bukan boleh main buang jer.. Botol tu ada category.. Like botol warna green kena buang kat tong warna green. And you have to make sure the glass botol pecah bila baling inside the tong. So kena saperate kan green, brown and white bottle. Quite hassle jugak la.. But untuk recycle punya pasal, I don't mind doing it.. (I will explain more about the Waste Management here in DE in my 101 series ok.. ) The whole Saturday was quite productive and at the end of the day, my husband rewarded me by preparing a hot bubble bath. Wah, bestnya.. Rendamkan badan dalam air panas after mengemas seharian during a cold autumn weather.

So since I was in a 'housekeeping' mood, this morning after having breakfast, while my husband was updating himself with his usual football news, I went to my laptop and cleaned my emails.. I have about more than 1000 unread emails.. meaning benda2 forward and benda2 yang my Actuary group emails ada yang tak terbaca.. so slowly la mengemas email.. I clicked at my Spam folder sbb sometimes some emails get sent there. Tiba - tiba, i saw two emails that was personally addressed to me.. maka saya pun membacalah.. since this is sort of like a private blog, i will share the email here..

From: ________ <*******82@yahoo.com>
To: *********@yahoo.com
Sent: Mon, October 11, 2010 6:07:35 AM
Subject: hi hi

Slm,

Long time never heard about your story. Selamat Hari Raya. How's life now? How's married life?

Actually I try to access your blog, but nowadays you have block it. If yo don't mind, may i request your permission to read your blog coz i used to read it and learn better English from reading your blog.

And again i'm requesting to be your friend in your Facebook. Hopefully I'm accepted to be your friend kak **** :)

your lil sis,

*****

Ok. If you receive an email like this, tell me how would you react ? Would you freak out ? Chill jer ? or buat dunno cause dah banyak dah dapat this sort of mail ? My reaction was like.. "ok, this is FREAKY!" Lemme fill you in on the details. See, I used to have a blog. A few blogs la.. Tapi yang paling lama dan paling penuh content nya is this one blog I used to call, "another blank page". That was my 2nd blog after my friendster blog yang bergelar "15 blankpage". I kinda like that name sbb ada "blank page" kat situ. It was sempena lagu Smashing Pumkins blankpage.. and dia track no 15. Sbb tu nama dia 15 blankpage. Anywayyy (tengok tu lari topic asal..), blog another blankpage tu was very public and I used to write really personal and meluahkan segala isi hati about life, work, love life and everything and anything possible. And I had like really random people reading it. Sehinggalah satu hari I realized that I should not write everything.. But, there was this one follower yang merupakan seorang silent reader. I remember quite clearly that I never revealed my yahoomail dalam my blog tu.. But she managed to get my email.. Which I dunno how.. And also found me in facebook. She requested to be my friend in fb after telling me that she was an avid follower of my blog. Dia citer dia rase macam rapat dgn i because we share the same birthday and she likes reading my blog (yang another blankpage tu) and wants to be a good writer like i am (ni kata2 dia okay, saya hanya quote balik jer). I rase mcm abit freaked out jugak. Tp I approved her request only to check siapa kawan - kawan dia. Turns out that I was the only one in her friendlike. Freaky! I terus remove her as friend n dia msg msg lagi tanya kenapa I bukan friend dia.. I ignored her and dia terus like, "takpelah kalau tak sudi nak jadi kawan,," things like that.. out of a sudden, dia msg I in YM.. I was like siapa nih ? dia pun sebut la nama dia.. and nak ajak borak.. I replied sket2 and terus ignore.. This was cerita last year..

Baru nih, dia email.. And I feel abit scared pulak. It could be anyone! I told my husband about this and he said I am a FREAK-magnet. I tend to attract freaks :p sabar je la.. But wouldn"t you be scared if you were in my shoes ? Sekarang ni sangatlah justified that I did what I did to slowly detach my identity in the cyberworld.. I replied her email and menanyakan siapa dia nih and kerja mana.. because I have no information whatsoever about this person.. and its kinda creeping me out..

Tentang Comment

The coldness is making me eating alot. Been eating and eating and eating.. and eating.. As I am typing, I am eating Hazelnüss Ritter Sport while having a glass of Fanta Orange.

Yesterday I wasn't feeling well. I was just lying on the bed tak larat nak buat apa. It was around noon that I decided to take a shower after I could see very little sunlight. SO la la la I am singing in the hot shower when suddenly the shower went kaputt. I had soap and syampoo sume. Tensyen! Air stopped. And I had blogged earlier how it is showering in this weather. The transition between after having shower and bersiap² is the worst part. So imagine the situation I am in. So kalot la pakai air singki. Demmit.

I memang tak puas hati. So I decided to go to bandar since I had to go and buy potatoes and sayurs and some meat. So singgahla Bauhaus. I saw a nice shower thingy and it had a shower radio in it for free.. Yippie. Ok la, balik² excited ni nak install the thing in my bathroom. So, settle pasang shower menggunakan playar. It took me 3 minutes to do it. Not bad la memori KH form 3..

I decided to reward myself dengan memasang 2 heater serentak sambil pasang computer. So, after a few minutes, POOF! the electricity went out. Aduh.. apa ni? Not another Day 5 mishap! The fuse went kaputt pulak in our bedroom. Frustrated and cold. I shifted everything to Unsere Wohnzimmer (our livingroom) and hung out there. Watched a few episodes of Kings of Queens and slept during The Gilmore Girls (they talk really fast.. and I dunno dah season berapa dah because Rory is with a new boyfriend now). Skali my husband called to check on me. Sejuk la pulak in the living room. I decided to call home and of course bila borak with Mama, I will forget everything that happened and started to make Beef Stew.

So.. anywayyyyyyyyyyyyy, this post is actually about Comments. I was browsing through facebook (biasalah.. as much as a blog about how much I don't fancy it, I still do). I realized some people who simply assume and dengan selambanya put some comments that may seem 'baik'.. For example, if a person puts a comment about her constant eating habit, people simply assume that she is pregnant dengan meletakkan comments² like this..

'pregnant ke?' - [oh please, be more obvious will ya]
'ada 'si kecik' dalam tu kot..' - [always followed by 'hehehe' ..nak berlapik la kire]
'dah berapa bulan ? tahniah' - [selambenya jumping into conclusion]

I have seen this happened to myself and to other people who I personally know that are having problems conceiving. And I don't appreciate those kind of comments and I find it really offensive when I read it even when it doesn't happen to me. Apa diorang dapat dengan tulis those kind of comments ?

Satu lagi if people assume that if a person is gonna get married. Or dengan selambanya menanyakan soalan tu in public. What if that person is single ? Or seeing someone tapi mcam tengah in a very sensitive stage. Tak ke menjejaskan relationship orang ? I think people should really tapis what they are gonna comment.

I think if it happened to me, I think ok lagi kot.. Tapi for those yang memang sedang ada masalah that they are aware or not aware of, they should not say that.. Just shouldn't.. Kita mana tau problem orang .. Padahal status dia pasal eating disorder jer.. Or sometimes letak gambar, nampak berisi sket je orang terus jump into conclusion. Kita nampak orang tu rilek jer.. Tapi dalam hati dia, kita taktau.. Jadi, as a social networker, I merayu pada other social networkers, soalan² or comment² sensitive, biarlah simpan dalam hati jer.. or another way of saying it, if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all..

sory²

Perasan tak the previous post has no title and ended just like that ? ok, I was blogging and suddenly my husband came back and I terus tertekan publish post :p hehehe actually I was waiting for the telur to masak so I blogged for awhile. Yesterday's dish was nasi lemak, kari daging and telur rebus. Sedap. It wasn't me who said it, it was my husband. heheheeh sorry I have no pictures. Dah licin habis dimakan.. I guess we were really that hungry. The heat is making us (or at least me) eat alot, sleep alot and laze around alot. Tak larat nak buat apa. But yesterday, the weather was just nice and I decided to surprise my husband with his fave dish :)

Everyday pikir nak masak apa. Sometimes dah sampai takde idea nak masak apa. Yeah² so random housewife talk kan.. hehehe well, its okay. I guess its kinda cool being a housewife. A friend once said , waah you are an expat housewife.. sounds so cool.. heheheh it would be if you're in Malaysia. but here, everyone is the same. Everyone speaks the same language no matter where you are from.. :)

Now that I am in level 2, we are at the difficult of Deutsch. Grammar! Deutsch is one of the most difficult language to learn. I would know, cause I am learning it. It's no where near English. I thought the articles were difficult. Tapi bila masuk dativ and akkusativ mak aih.. And all of this are only in present tense. Belum past tense lagi! oh gosh.. Tabik hormat (lama tak cakap nih) to those who studied in Germany for their degree or masters. Because it is not easy to learn a 3rd language (eg. Deutsch) and also learn a difficult course in it... Most of the time, I am just trying to figure out what they're trying to say or ask..... and then... figure out the answer and how to reply in Deutsch.. that will take me a few seconds.... :p

Hope I will manage! okay.. its 7am now.. gotta get ready for class.. catcha later!

Bis Dann!

Ben Harper

Currently I am listening to Ben Harper's Waiting on an angel. The song sounds so sincere and deep.

I read through my old blog from the very beginning till the end. It has more than 500 plus posts and I decided to stop blog there. Hence the new blog here. What's funny is that I saw myself back then, four years ago, and how I evolved to be someone I am right now. Not much difference in term of size but I guess I have matured abit (I hope). Some of the things are still the same. I am still that goofy person who sings in the shower and talk alot sometimes about nothing or everything under the hot sun. I used to blog about the random-est thing and it was to me back then some sort of a Dear Diary blog. Except that what it really meant was Dear Everyone. Later I changed to a more discussion kinda blog.

Sayang juga nak tutupkan the blog.. But I have my reasons why I am doing that.. so, here is to a new life and new blog writing here :)

facebook.com Part 2 : An epiphany

I drafted a post 2 days ago and almost hit publish post but had to do something and totally forgot about it and left the page idle. And now, it's gone. Sigh. Well, maybe it wasn't meant to be. Although it was how I felt at that moment, now that the feeling is gone, it doesn't matter anymore.

Have you ever felt like your life is like a stage being watched by everyone through facebook ? I had that feeling a few weeks or perhaps months ago (and had blogged about it too). But it's truly by choice I guess. And I had chosen to tone it down a bit. But of course, I still have the urge of waking up every morning and checking out any red blocks by the left pane showing the number of notifications. Crazy ? Perhaps. I bet it's not just me though. Once you hit HOME to the News Feed, you keep on scrolling down and read other people's status updates and sometimes rolling your eyes to how ridiculous it may sound to you. Up to one point, you can summarize the types of people in facebook. The farmers, the LOLers, the likers, the taggers, the marketers, the photofreaks, the peace-HARDCORE (people who will pose with a peace sign on all 200 photos in one album), the babytalker (who does the talking for their babies), the traffic updater, the weather forecaster, the ManU fans, the attention seeker (status update : XXXXXX is smiling from ear to ear. Finally it's really happening!!! Comments : what's up ? Replies : hehehe ooo nothing.. its just such a nice day today.. finally its gonna rain) Me : GAGING (LAME! Obviously you want SOMEONE to notice something BIG is about to happen in your life and want other people to wonder about it), the sharing their marriage problem / life with everyone else when their in the same house at the same time (syg nak makan apa harini? telur dah habis la.. nanti ayang gi beli okay.. hihihi) OMG! someone kill me already!, the liking their own status update, and I can go on and on about this.. But really, why is facebook so addictive? Wanna know their secret?

It's the name. FACEBOOK. you have your book on your face all the time. It's a book that is stuck to your face. And you'd wanna read it all the time. and want it to look good all the time just as you would want to make your face look good all the time.. so people can read. People can see how cool you are, where you hang out and what kind of lifestyle you have, people can easily conclude what kind of person you are. Well you cant blame them for doing so, since you had that image portrayed to the WORLD WIDE WEB.. and people do judge a Book by its cover.. that's why there is a saying not to because people simply do.. It's all through the WORLD WIDE WEB. It's a web but world wide. See how big the web is? We are all caught up in this big web we think of as world wide. And facebook has hit on almost every TV series; SouthPark, numb3rs, House, CSI, etc. It's now the in thing, the lifestyle of normal people to feel glamourous or popular. Engineers have invented softwares to accomodate this feature into mobile phones so that you can update your status or upload your pictures from anywhere possible. Even if you're in Iceland, you can be the first person to SHARE to the WORLD WIDE WEB after a volcano errupts. Of course there are pros and cons about this. I have seen and heard, friendship torn apart, girlfriends - boyfriends break up, marriages became shakey, people become flamboyant, people become envious, have evil eyes lurking around, people filled hatred, denial and everything else.. only through facebook. It is not only a social network that connects people, it's a phenomena. 

facebook.com. I have done a simple research on this. It's all in the name. Let's look at STARBUCKS. See how well their business is. Because they have money as much as the stars in the skies. And we all don't know how much is that but I am certain that it's a lot.. And who doesn't like stars? That's why they are making bigbucks. GIANT. See how big their business have grown? They built a BIG GIANT from KJ and another one in Gombak, that's like one end of a highway from my house to the other end highways to my husband's house. PAPPARICH, I bet the owner is getting richer everyday since they have a lot of branches around KL and PJ area I've seen lately. And many more.

So after blogging about facebook.com (AGAIN), then it hit me. I need a name to start my business. And I need a business to start. I need an epiphany, a revelation.

facebook.com

Tomorrow is my last day of being 28. I dont feel any different though. But my birthday this year is gonna be so different. Reasons are:-

• This is my first birthday as being a wife. Hence, Mr. Lucky will say, 'It's my wife's birthday' 
• This is the first time I celebrate my birthday with my husband after 4+ years of being in a relationship (couple + marriage)
• This is the first time I celebrate my birthday in a foreign country
• This is the first time I will do a party where prepare almost everything from scratch (slalu mama will help)

So I am gonna be 29. Usually I will do a self-reflection kinda thingy on my birthday. Maybe I will do it the night before.. I havent been blogging lately. Although there are soooo many things to blog about, seriously sooo many things happen. I wouldnt know how and where to start if I would start telling. Maybe I should just leave it as that or as time passes by, I will write about it.

Many reasons why I stopped blogging for awhile.

• I was very occupied and getting used to the new routine I have. Now that I am finally getting the hang of it, I got used to the change. I used to blog about how I hate changes and also the transition so much now that there is this SUPER HUGE change, I got used to it already.
• Perhaps that I was too hooked up on facebook, I kinda forgot about my blog.. 
• I was on a hiatus mode and I don't know why I just malas sangat nak blog.
• I had all my energies out on talking to my husband and I need not to blog anymore since he is at home all the time and I could just talk to him non stop (kesian dia.. hehehe)
• There are just things that I feel I don't need to share with the world wide web

The last point, I feel so much I wanna blog about that and how ironically that I dont wanna share but I wanna share about not sharing.. get it? At one point, I got so sick of facebook, I felt like wanting to deactivate my account. I even thought about opening a new one consisting only CLOSE PEOPLE THAT MATTERS. Why you might ask?

• I got sick of people tagging me with pictures which are not relevant to me at all (eg. kain, tudung, cupcakes, handbags, wedding invites, DECRIBE ME, Top ten lists and all those craps)
• I got irritated receiving endless notifications which I have to read that has nothing to do with me
• Its really disturbing to get email notifications on people's comments which are so trivial, such as 'hehehe' or 'LOL' on something that is not related to me whatsoever.
• Some of the status updates are just so lame
• I got tired of ignoring all the group invites which I never check or participate at all. 
• Its funny how people wanna upload all 200 pictures of the same place with different poses. Cant they just choose the best few?
• It's weird that married people communicate to each other through facebook where anyone at all can see and read when they are just 2 feet away from each other.
• I find it confusing that people update their status as 'busy' or 'no time to do this and that' but have time to update their status.

See, I was at that point. I was at the point where facebook was soo irritating, I decided to cool it down forawhile. I know, you might ask, why not just quit anyway? biar la people nak buat apa² with their facebook rite ? I know I know.. I dont know why.. It has become part of my routine.. But I am slowly detaching myself so that I won't be in the statistics of people who spend 4 hours on facebook daily.

So there I said it. I had let my enery out after a month of not blogging. I am back people!